Emotional Breakdown
Nov. 16th, 2015 10:19 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
yonkyuIt has been a rough few weeks for me and I had a breakdown last Tuesday night after work. I was not understanding an assignment for my major paper and it is a huge part of this paper; so I got very upset and frustrated. I emailed my teacher and had a conversation about creating the 'goals' necessary for my paper. I finally understood what she was talking about and feel better about my goals and challenge for my major paper. She reassured me that I was doing great and try not to get frustrated. It was hard not too. I broke down and cried like I haven't since I was a kid. It took me awhile to calm down and move on from the anxiety I was feeling about my assignment. I moved past it and worked on my goals and 2 of them have been approved, now I need to redefine my goals and praying they get approved and make sense for my specific challenge I have chosen.
Now, I recently learned that I have had some episodes of anxiety with overwhelming stress. It was discovered at my physical this year. I have my mom who I am really close it and spoke with her about how I was feeling regarding my assignment. My mom reassured me that everything will fall into place and to think about the assignment in a different way. It was helpful and I got a 4.0 out of 4.0 points for the assignment.
Sadly, my mom is my only support team when it comes to me emotions and feelings about different situations. I keep everything bottled inside because I am an only child and felt like I needed to learn how to do things on my own without help from others. My parents have been supportive and encouraging of what I chose to do and were always there to help me when I struggled, but since I was the only child, I felt like I should be able to everything on my own without the help of others. When I do ask for help, I am truly seeking out the help, and I do not always receive that help, and I become sad. I have friends on RL and friends here on LJ that ARE helpful and have given me amazing and wonderful advice, suggestions, and support at dealing with my emotions. Sometimes, I just want to talk and have someone to listen, but I feel like others don't understand what I am talking about. So I read. And age play, infantilism, and age regression stories help support my need to be comforted when I am dealing with my emotions. I have been role playing for a year now, and it's only the use of a pacifier and a sippy cup. I have found that a bottle is a challenge. It helps ease my mind and heart when I explore this side of me, and it helps with the stress and anxiety feelings. I have started 2 stories in this genre, but would love to speak with those who currently write in this genre for advice, suggestions and support.
Now, I recently learned that I have had some episodes of anxiety with overwhelming stress. It was discovered at my physical this year. I have my mom who I am really close it and spoke with her about how I was feeling regarding my assignment. My mom reassured me that everything will fall into place and to think about the assignment in a different way. It was helpful and I got a 4.0 out of 4.0 points for the assignment.
Sadly, my mom is my only support team when it comes to me emotions and feelings about different situations. I keep everything bottled inside because I am an only child and felt like I needed to learn how to do things on my own without help from others. My parents have been supportive and encouraging of what I chose to do and were always there to help me when I struggled, but since I was the only child, I felt like I should be able to everything on my own without the help of others. When I do ask for help, I am truly seeking out the help, and I do not always receive that help, and I become sad. I have friends on RL and friends here on LJ that ARE helpful and have given me amazing and wonderful advice, suggestions, and support at dealing with my emotions. Sometimes, I just want to talk and have someone to listen, but I feel like others don't understand what I am talking about. So I read. And age play, infantilism, and age regression stories help support my need to be comforted when I am dealing with my emotions. I have been role playing for a year now, and it's only the use of a pacifier and a sippy cup. I have found that a bottle is a challenge. It helps ease my mind and heart when I explore this side of me, and it helps with the stress and anxiety feelings. I have started 2 stories in this genre, but would love to speak with those who currently write in this genre for advice, suggestions and support.
no subject
Date: 2015-11-17 09:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2015-11-19 01:24 am (UTC)