The Real Me

Hi Everyone,

Sorry for being MIA since the start of the lockdown.

Before the lockdown, I met up with my bestie, deanshot, up at VegasCon 2020, known as the no-touchy con. I have to say that I'm VERY GRATEFUL this convention ran as well as it did and was not canceled, even though it was rescheduled twice. I had the best time of my life that weekend and I hope to do it again in the future, even if it's not a convention.

When I arrived home, I worked 3 days that week, and March 13 I was told we would be closed for two weeks. Two weeks turned into three months. At the beginning of the shutdown, I was not in a good place at all. I didn't know what to do with myself. It was nice to have a break but then I had to do Zoom with my toddler class and that was an experience. They did well and it was great to see them every day even if it was just on a screen.

I did find my footing at being home with my parents. I would do my Zoom call in the morning, do some professional development, and play video games, which I didn't have to play by myself. I was able to play with a friend and all my karate kids under the age of 14 play Fortnite and Animal Crossing. Once they found out I was home, they FaceTimed me nonstop. Some times I had to explain that I was in meetings and doing work things and I would play later.

And, what else did I do during this time, I wrote. I know, surprising right. Well, I wrote at least five different works for my original works at Madrona and I was very excited and happy with myself for completing rough drafts, which was something I never did before. So YAY for me. Now, its time for editing and I've been avoiding it like you would not believe. My goal moving forward is EDITING!!!

Hope all of my online friends are doing well!!! I miss you all!!!

Lately, I've been in a weird place and I'm crawling out of it one step at a time. And I've been having a hard time explaining it and I just need to get some stuff off my chest.

Work: So the boss of craziness has been back and how does an environment that was tense get even worse. I hate walking on eggshells and having to explain myself multiple times to be believed. And within the last three weeks, my co-teacher and I had to complete a portfolio for NAEYC that was due Jan 31. In reality, we had about two and a half weeks to complete it. We worked together and got it done. Then today, I was yelled at by my co-teacher because I did not have the attendance completed. While when I realized I had no form to complete it and never got office time to get it done, and having a new child attached to me and would become upset if I left the room, I could not complete this task. So, I feel like I can't do anything right or be human.

Writing: This has gotten better and I'm trying to find a way to keep my confidence up. I've been taking things slow and really working through each step to make my stories better and better. I take the time to write and then go back to it and start the editing process to write again and again. Or write more and more. I've been attempting to try new things and really come out of my comfort zone. I writing what I like and with characters that speak to me. I have yet to rewatch some episodes to watch and study specific characters and have a better connection with said characters for my writing. Really get inside the why of a character and focus on one topic at a time. It's been part of the reason why I have not posted much.

Small Business Building: So this is something I don't talk much away, but I use essential oils and I have liked the benefits I have had with the use of them. And I have the opportunity to grow a business and I just had my first workshop sharing essential oils. It's something I'm willing to try to earn some extra cash and to see if I have the power to grow and meet new people, go out of my comfort zone. It's something I'm going to work slowly on building and seeing how it goes.

Karate: So, I've been doing karate for almost 19 years and just received my 6th Degree Black Belt last month. And last year I attended a few more tournaments that I would normally do, again trying to come out of my comfort zone. So, this year, I made a promise to myself that I would go to all the close to home tournaments and see how I do. See if I receive feedback from the judges and/or the competitors. Right now I have received some wonderful and helpful feedback and I'm so grateful and honored to receive it and accept it (something that's hard to accept in many aspects of my life, writing included). It's never been about the medals or trophies, it's about going out there and taking a chance on myself. Pushing myself to do what I'm capable of doing and achieving. I signed up for this tournament group Ippone and will attempt to complete as many tournaments as I can. At the end of the year, there are special awards given out, I'm curious to see if I would receive any. But I'm trying something new and going outside my comfort zone.

So, I've realized that it's been quite a while since I really shared anything going on in my life and its time that I get a few things off my chest.

( Update... )

Well, I will be leaving in a few hours to head on a business trip for work. I'm heading to Washington, DC for a conference for Birth to Three. Its a annual conference that takes place in DC, and I was offered the opportunity to go to the conference. I will be taking many different training's to support my professional growth as a teacher and I am so excited about it!!! I will be returning home Thursday night. I am hoping the group I am going with wants to go on a tour and see the city!!! It will be fun and I will share about my trip when I get back.

I am excited to start writing my next story while I'm gone and I have some new reading material during my breaks of writing. I have to read some Big Bang stories and comment on those and read an mpreg story that has been recently posted. Another weakness of mine. Anyway, I will still stay up-to-date with everyone's posting!!!!

Hi Everyone,

I am looking for a children's poem relating to snowflakes. If you could find one and send it my way that would be great. Thank you!